Frog legs

I dreamed last night that I went to visit an old friend. In the dream she was married but had no kids, which is weird because I think the opposite is true now. Anyway, she lived in a small silver houseboat that was docked at the edge of a crystal lake surrounded by trees that you had to hike up a mountain to get to. It was very beautiful.

At the beginning of the hike was a city with elegant suspension bridges and towers rising to the sky. And of course, since I’m obsessed, all of this was in Japan.

I remember having to take the train to get to the city, and then hiking to the houseboat, but that’s really it.

At some point I was hanging out with the Ninja Turtles (natch), and one of them–I think it may have been Donatello–said to someone else, “Can you cut this leg off for me? It’s getting to be a nuisance.”

The other person came out with a large hand saw and rested it over Donatello’s leg. I turned to whoever it was I was with (maybe it was still my old friend) and smiled that they were taking the joke that far.

Then the guy started sawing Donatello’s leg off!

Okay, I thought, he’s not actually cutting off his leg, just some outer padding thing he’s wearing that happens to look just like his leg.

The sawing stopped, and the guy started peeling something back. At first I thought my wild explanation had been correct, but then I saw that he was just peeling Don’s Street Frogs-esque jean shorts out of the way.

“What the hell is going on here?” yelled my companion as the sawing resumed.

“I don’t know,” I said.

Don’s leg finally fell off, and he leaned back and we could see up into his shell, and his body wasn’t there. He grunted and shifted, and then another leg came out of another hole!

“There, that’s better,” he said, and another leg came out, so that he had four leg holes and three legs altogether.

In a later dream I was trying to go to the bathroom, and there was a really inconvenient stall at the end beyond the sink, but when I tried to go in there the toilet was a low circle with no seat, and there were telltale signs of men having used it. I wondered (in the dream) if this was what urinals looked like. (I know what urinals look like!)

As I was waiting for one of the other stalls to become available, my phone rang. I picked it up and it said “Joe (Brimstone)” on my caller ID. Joe’s an old AMRN friend who, as far as I know, has never had my phone number.

“Hello!” I said brightly.

“Hi there! Are calls always this clear?” Joe said.

“I don’t know,” I said. “Maybe it has to do with where I’m standing? But anyway, how are you doing?”

“Oh, I’m great! How’s my best friend though?”

“Best friend?” I repeated. “We haven’t spoken in, like, two years!” (I couldn’t remember the exact figure in my dream. Still can’t, really, though I believe Joe’s popped up on the boards within the last six months.)

My old friend from the first dream (and perhaps the second) was standing at the entry to the bathroom, and she gave me a surprised look when I said that.

Joe was quiet; this seemed to offend him. So I pushed on. “I’m doing pretty well,” I said as I gave up on the bathroom and walked outside. It was dark out, but there were streetlights. “Wow, there’s a big frog out here that looks like a piece of wood,” I said, circling it. “Or maybe it’s a piece of wood that looks like a frog…”

He still wasn’t answering. I didn’t know what else to say. (This was all very out of character for Joe!)

I woke up with some blanket under my ear, and at first I thought I had fallen asleep while on the phone :>