I am the "maid of honor"; plus, a quiz for You.

I’ve made breakfast for my husband two days in a row. Where I come from, that’s an accomplishment. That means…it’s time for a crap post! (Yes, you guessed it, more quizzes. Sorry, AJ.)

First up:

Appreciated for your kindness and envied for all your experience, you are The Maid of Honor.

Charismatic, affectionate, and terrific in relationships, you are what many guys would call a “perfect catch”–and you probably have many admirers, each wishing to capture your long-term love. You’re careful, extra careful, because the last thing you want is to hurt anyone. Especially some poor boy whose only crime was liking you.

We’ve deduced you’re fully capable of a dirty fling, but you do feel that post-coital attachment after hooking up. So, conscientious person that you are, you do your best to reserve physical affection for those you respect…so you can respect yourself.

Your biggest negative is the byproduct of your careful nature: indecision. You’re just as slow rejecting someone as you are accepting them.

Take this quiz!
I don’t know about you, but I think my personality rocks. XD

Up next: This isn’t actually a quiz for me. It’s a quiz for you. Go on, people. Tell me what you really think!

1. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.

2. Am I loveable?

3. How long have you known me?

4. When and how did we first meet?

5. What was your first impression?

6. Do you still think that way about me now?

7. What do you think my weakness is?

8. Do you think I’ll get married?

9. What makes me happy?

10. What makes me sad?

11. What reminds you of me?

12. If you could give me anything what would it be?

13. How well do you know me?

14. When’s the last time you saw me?

15. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn’t?

16. Do you think I could kill someone?

17. Describe me in one word.

18. Do you think our friendship is getting stronger/weaker/or staying the same?

19. Do you feel that you could talk to me about anything and I would listen?

20. Are you going to put this on your journal and see what I say about you?

I wouldn’t have done this one if Dawn hadn’t done it. After I filled hers out, I got all intrigued, and now I’m wondering what you guys will say. I’m not going to email this to people and beg them to fill it out. This is completely voluntary. So if you feel like it, dump your answers in the comments.

1 comment

  1. Original comments from Livejournal

    hyper_neko – 2004-01-31 11:39 pm UTC

    Taking your quiz in one easy reply ^_^
    1) Hea-chan, because (1) I already call ya that. (2) It gives ya more cute and personal connection with me as a friend. ^_^
    2)Very lovable, indeed. ^_^
    3)あのう。。。I think for about, uh…3-4 years now(online, ‘ourse)
    4)Online in a comment on AMRN, first real convers when I was wantin’ to GM and ya IMed me.
    5) Very nice and super neat!
    6)Course! Although I know not to do ‘stupid’ things around ya, for yours and my benefit. ^_^
    7) I think, that ya try to do taken on too much when nobody steps up (on AMRN that is), other than that you’re a bit indecisive.
    8) Umm..you’re already married? O.o
    9)Lots of stuff, chocolate, when people post often, stuff like that. ^_^
    10) I’ve really haven’t been around ya when you’re sad, actually…
    11) A really smart chibi with neko ears in front of a labtop. ^_^ Sorta Seraphim-like (MT) in a way, only much cooler and stuffs.
    12) I’d get the creator of Macross do to a new TV series based on our adventures on AMRN. ^_^
    13) Techincally, not that well since I know ya only online.
    14)*blinks* in the flesh, never. Online, just last night.
    15) Nope, I think I could tell ya anything.
    16) Literally, nope. Although I’d bet you have a strong chair-throwing arm ^_^
    17) youthfully-wise.
    18) I’d say stronger, since we do talk more than when I first met ya. you know my moods, and I know yours. We kinda know our basics and whatnot.
    19) Honestly, yes. You’ve done it before after all. ^_^
    20) I think I might, just curious on what you’d say.

    cosleia – 2004-02-01 12:08 am UTC

    Although I’m not sure “youthfully-wise” is a word ;>

    I am flattered, though. Thanks!

    zshade – 2004-02-01 04:17 am UTC

    1. I don’t think I’ve ever had a nickname for you, but if pressed, I suppose “She Who Smites People” might work.
    2. Quite.
    3. Mid-1999.
    4. Daytime, at a mall, when your husband-to-be and myself proceed to bore the hell out of you by talking shop about the MRN.
    5. “I feel bad for her, listening to us.”
    6. Nah, you married him, so you deserve what you get from that. ^_-
    7. An inability to achieve the far reaching goals you set for yourself. You need to remember that you’re still young, and that you have a good life. All things come in time.
    8. Married? You? Never!
    9. Accomplishing the goals you set for yourself.
    10. See the above, adjust it to negative. Oh, and assholes.
    11. Macross, English majors, Augusta, and Kim.
    12. Money, and a paid for house, so you can host parties for your friends.
    13. Not as well as I think, sometimes.
    14. Er… I can’t remember if it was AWA several years ago, or on toward Christmas several years ago.
    15. Yep.
    16. I’m sure you’ve wanted to, but I don’t think you would.
    17. Determined.
    18. I think it’s been weaker than it used to be once, but getting stronger from it’s low point.
    19. Yes.
    20. Sure.

    cosleia – 2004-02-01 04:25 am UTC

    I keep forgetting to click “reply to this” instead of “post a new comment”
    Do I really smite people? :>

    Nice telling of our first meeting. My favorite part of that adventure was when I fell asleep. ;D I remember something about Excaliburs (I had no idea what they were at the time) and abuse on the site that had to be cleaned up by Tsunami. That is pretty much all I can think of.

    But yeah, thereafter I was sucked into that world…I’m glad it happened, because at least it kept me writing. I also have some experience moderating and organizing things that I can talk about in job interviews ;>

    Your proposed gift to me is fantastic. I want both of those things!

    zshade – 2004-02-01 04:40 am UTC

    Re: I keep forgetting to click “reply to this” instead of “post a new comment”
    Well, you may not have smitten anyone, but you probably should.

    And you know, I do still have your first RP test. Maybe I should post that somewhere, hmm? =)

    cosleia – 2004-02-01 04:41 am UTC

    No one should be subjected to that abomination O_O

    zshade – 2004-02-01 04:42 am UTC

    Why not? *I* was entertained when I reread it.

    cosleia – 2004-02-01 04:45 am UTC

    Here is a paraphrase.
    I have a scar! (Aren’t all characters supposed to have an “identifying feature”?) I have no personality and can make no decisions! I have no idea what I’m doing!

    The End.

    zshade – 2004-02-01 04:46 am UTC

    My first couple of posts were much much worse than that, let me assure you. Fortunately, I have gone and had those retroactively removed from existance.

    cosleia – 2004-02-01 04:48 am UTC

    Re: Bah.
    I’m glad that first character of mine never made it into the game. Looking back, she was pretty boring. I hadn’t really fleshed her out in my mind, and I think that’s why I had trouble playing her.

    zshade – 2004-02-01 04:51 am UTC

    Re: Bah.
    Yeah, that’s a problem sometimes. Other times, it gets to be a character is virtually the same person as another character you play. Making character seperate and distinct can be a bit tricky if you don’t pay attention.

    Or if you don’t exaggerate something about the character. =)

    cosleia – 2004-02-01 04:53 am UTC

    How many nested posts does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop?
    I usually try to make my characters as different as possible, but I have had that problem crop up a couple times. I guess it’s because they all come from the same place :>

    zshade – 2004-02-01 04:57 am UTC

    I mainly got around it by focusing on the different parts of my own personality. It mostly worked, though it completely failed at other points, especially back when I had a dozen characters or so.

    cosleia – 2004-02-01 05:01 am UTC

    One, ah-twoohoo, ah-thuree–*crunch* Thuree.
    Another problem I have sometimes is making characters act like other characters by mistake…o_o If I don’t get into that character’s “zone”, bad things can happen.

    zshade – 2004-02-01 05:06 am UTC

    Second verse, same as the first, turn it around and sing it in reverse
    Yeah, I can just see it now… “Uh, why are you putting your hand there? It’s flattering and all, but I like girls.”

    I don’t think I’ve had a character act like another one. I have done things like box in their development, and have to write something unconvincing to get them out of it.

    cosleia – 2004-02-01 05:09 am UTC

    Fo’ shizzle
    It’s impossible to have character growth when the story progresses so slowly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’ve done unrealistic things for that same reason, and I’ve always hated having to do it. O the compromises we must make for the message board, collaborative format :>

    zshade – 2004-02-01 05:13 am UTC

    Third verse, same as before, take a deep breath and sing some more
    It’s not impossible, just very very hard. I mean, Shinji went from a quiet, mildly depressed schmuck to a quiet, relatively happy schmuck. Hotaru and Megumi both went downhill… and I think that’s about it for my character development. =/

    cosleia – 2004-02-01 05:26 am UTC

    Kim went through the most drastic changes, but they were all pretty much outward, as you and I spoke about once before. She had a problem with burying her issues, and a serious case of self-hatred. It was really hard to deal with that in-game, and I also felt bad because realistically it should take her a long time to get over it, and in the meantime it felt like lying to Shinji. :/

    Julien sort of miraculously got over his issues with himself when he realized he was gay, and this took place off-camera. I should probably write that out someday. But I do think that having that revelation, and accepting it, would take a huge load off.

    Mick is currently changing from a grieving obnoxious prick to an obnoxious prick who just might be able to love again.

    Milla is working on her insecurities too, though she has the problem of trying to figure out which guy is right for her. Currently she’s with the CAG (not Ryu), but Ryu wants her (though he hasn’t said anything), and then there’s Bill, her ex, who may or may not be over her, and then the worst of all is her little crush on the Captain, and the fact that he is starting to think of her romantically…at least subconsciously.

    I have no idea why Milla is so attractive to everyone.

    Amzin, who I may or may not stop playing (still going back and forth…ugh), is learning about emotions, but in some ways she’s not as fun as the others because she essentially starts from nowhere. She’s had her “OMG culture” moment already, so now it’s just minor things like sexual attraction and what it might mean, and then more vague items like figuring out her place in the culture, how cultures work, etc.

    My newest character, Celia, is a rich, bright, optimistic young scientist and RIO who was recently slapped in the face with a situation that seemed completely illogical and impossible. This totally destroyed her worldview and she’s working on rebuilding it, grasping tightly to her belief in science. She also has her first-ever boyfriend, which is extraordinarily fun to RP. It’s her first love, really, but she’s old enough that she’s analyzing it even as she lets herself go.

    So yeah, I guess I think of them as constantly changing based on events that happen to them…

    zshade – 2004-02-01 05:46 am UTC

    Fourth verse… and I’m out of clever things.
    Well, if we’re going to be detailed…

    Shinji had problems getting over his deceased fiancee. He did this with the help of Kim in a whirlwind romance that still makes me cringe. Then she dumped him, and Hotaru more or less forced her way into his life. When Kim returned, he waffled like hell for a while, then dumped Hotaru and went back to Kim. I feel bad about it, but Hotaru was his rebound relationship.

    Speaking of Hotaru, she went from achieving her dream to getting punted to the curb. She’s found out what it’s like to love someone who’s in love with someone else. And she’s discovered the bittersweet knowledge that she wants him to be happy even at her own expense.

    Megumi…. Megumi emotionally collasped, and I hate how I brought her out of it. That could have been written so much better, and I’d like to redo it someday.

    Aika received a personality. Good enough.

    Everyone else was retired, not applicable, or sucked.

    cosleia – 2004-02-01 05:53 am UTC

    What do you mean “if”?
    I’m always detailed ;D

    bleudonne – 2004-02-01 06:06 am UTC

    Re: What do you mean “if”?
    If I don’t know you two so well, I’d be scared… reeeeeally scared by now. Hehehe…

    Anyway, my two cents.

    My tons of former characters doesn’t really count because well, I never stuck with them, so let’s talk about my longest surviving and now frozen character, Iliana.

    She started out sweet and naive, a pretty airhead with a heart of gold, and she slowly grew more disillusioned as she sees more and more. Julien helped her grow a little, methinks, and he was a good support, but she was never too sure whether he was coming and going (for good reason! hehe) and she was still hung up over this guy she met on the streets when she was 14 and running away from her filthy-rich-but-too busy dad… and I think that she’s finally realized that flying a Valk is not all fun and work, combat is /real/, and people die.

    I rather like how she grew from a two dimensional character to a more well-developed and for me, real character. Unfortunately, she’s beyond me now. Oh well…

    bleudonne – 2004-02-01 05:06 am UTC

    First character blues…
    My first character had a scar too. And I thought she was special because of it. I was rid of that notion pretty fast, mind you. *grins*

    cosleia – 2004-02-01 05:09 am UTC

    Re: First character blues…
    LOL. I think there was an Academy squadron recently in which every single one of them had tattoos.

    bleudonne – 2004-02-01 05:12 am UTC

    Re: First character blues…
    So that’s the trend, huh? Wonder if who started the trend… next, it’ll be piercings… though you’d really have to wonder what happens when you have a piercing on certain body parts and it gets ripped off in a bar brawl or something. O_o;; Eeeeeevil…

    Btw, are piercings even allowed in the Academy?

    zshade – 2004-02-01 05:13 am UTC

    At least everyone wasn’t an orphan.

    cosleia – 2004-02-01 05:15 am UTC

    Re: Well…
    They probably were. I haven’t seen their c-sheets.

    Mr. J usually refuses orphans, but Foreman’s been doing c-sheets now, so some might have slipped past.

    zshade – 2004-02-01 05:30 am UTC

    Re: Well…
    As long as we don’t see an Orion Starfire, or something silly.

    cosleia – 2004-02-01 05:38 am UTC

    Re: Well…
    How do the names Dwer “Coolhand” Koolhan, Xanathos Starfire, and Scott Matrix strike you?

    zshade – 2004-02-01 05:48 am UTC

    Re: Well…
    1st one sounds like one of them thar foreign names. You always said the 2nd had a real story behind it, and the third…. is pretty bad.

    cosleia – 2004-02-01 05:57 am UTC

    Re: Well…
    Oh come on. “Dwer” is just “Drew”, rearranged. (I know this because a friend of the player told me.) And “Koolhan” was obviously chosen so that his callsign would be “Coolhand”.

    Ugh, it annoys me to even think about :> (Dawn is so, so right, about my perfectionism.)

    The second one does have a story. A lame one. (Basically: the family changed their last name, he changed his own first name.)

    The third one is in the Academy right now. How that name got past our crew, I will never know. Once I take over admissions to M2051, that shit won’t fly ;D

    bleudonne – 2004-02-01 05:25 am UTC

    Re: Well…
    My first character was. Gosh… orphan and scarred, with a dead twin to revenge, trained as an assassin, and wears black all the time. >_< Man… are all first characters like this?

    cosleia – 2004-02-01 05:27 am UTC

    Yes they are.

    zshade – 2004-02-01 05:28 am UTC

    Re: Well…
    Not all are. Shinji was merely scarred, with a dead fiancee, and no one to revenge himself upon.

    cosleia – 2004-02-01 05:16 am UTC

    Re: First character blues…
    You wouldn’t think so, but then again, some of the outrageous anime hair probably wouldn’t be allowed either. If Gamlin can get away with his hairstyle (o_o) then anything’s possible…

    zshade – 2004-02-01 05:29 am UTC

    Re: First character blues…
    It’s all that cloning. Does weird stuff to hair.

    j3r3d – 2004-02-01 08:08 am UTC

    *cough* Ahem.
    I’d like to point out that my first MRN character had neither a scar, nor a tattoo when he started. Though, he had both by the end of his training… Doh. He’s in a coma right now, that’s cool, right? *halo*

    cosleia – 2004-02-01 09:57 am UTC

    Oh, yeah, definitely.
    Definitely cool, definitely. Huh-huh-huh. Definitely. Cool.


    Original comments from Xanga

    1. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
    Heather-chan. That’s what I’ve been calling you for the past few years ^_^ and I picked it because it fits you and you’re such a good friend.

    2. Am I loveable?
    Yes, you are :) I think many people are of the same opinion too, although you are opinionated too, which may make some ppl feel differently.

    3. How long have you known me?
    Since the end of ’99… one of the few people I’ve meet on the AMRN since then that I still keep in touch with regularly. ^_^

    4. When and how did we first meet?
    *laughs* You told the story so well. The Iliana-me knew you as Julien, and we had a great time exchanging emails getting to know each other… you’re an amazing writer, still is :) Was thinking that Julien was a pretty good catch too, till I found out Julien and Heather are the same person, and I’m sure you’re quite happy in HF’s arms ^_~

    5. What was your first impression?
    Julien – Wow, this guy can sure write! And such sensitivity and understanding from a guy… amazing.
    Heather – Wow, this girl can sure write! That Rei and Cyrus story is so romantic! And she’s pretty cool too, one of the few female RPers around… friendly, intelligent and not afraid of voicing her opinions.
    Clash of both – WOW! Hmm… I guess that’s why Julien was a girl’s dream guy… because it’s a girl and a girl knows what a girl wants! ^_^

    6. Do you still think that way about me now?
    About not being afraid of saying what you think, yes. That you’re friendly, intelligent and an amazing writer, yes. You had a bad patch in the past when you were in the dumps for quite a while, but I’m very glad you’re out of it now.

    7. What do you think my weakness is?
    I think you’re a perfectionist, and that sometimes gives you problems because people are not perfect, and just because you want things a certain way doesn’t mean other ppl will listen, and that grieves you sometimes. Maybe grieves is too strong a word… annoy?

    8. Do you think I’ll get married?
    I don’t think I need to answer this… hehe.

    9. What makes me happy?
    Being with HF, writing kick-ass posts and I think achieving the objectives you mentioned in your earlier post…

    10. What makes me sad?
    *ponder* You miss your family back in Kentucky, and well… not having kids. -_- *big hug*

    11. What reminds you of me?
    Hmm… your journal.. hehe. Check it every day :) AMRN too, because I still read stuff in Gen Dis and you’re pretty vocal there..+

    12. If you could give me anything what would it be?
    A trip too… to Malaysia to visit me and see the place, and for you and HF to go to Japan and live there, because I know you love the place. ^_^

    13. How well do you know me?
    I think I understand you pretty well, and I know you enough to trust you with a lot of things that I don’t tell other people and I think that we have a special bond due to the rarity of females in the AMRN… hehe. But even after I’ve left the AMRN, we’re still good friends, ne? ^_^

    14. When’s the last time you saw me?
    This morning, on AIM

    15. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn’t?
    *ponder* There are still things that are difficult for me to say, but that’s not because of you, it’s because that’s the way I am. Well, for one, it’s difficult for me to talk about my love life, as you have mentioned, because even I could not be totally sure where it’s heading… most of the time. *wry grin*

    16. Do you think I could kill someone?
    Yes. You are very protective of your loved ones, and I think that if anyone tries to hurt them, you might just kill them to defend them… but never on purpose.

    17. Describe me in one word.
    That’s tough… you’re one of the smartest people I know, and you have such a quick wit and an amazing capacity to learn, curiousity about the world and events around you and you’re such a wonderful writer… I’d go with Brilliant. (I’d make the word twinkly and shiny, but I don’t know how to! ^_^;;)

    18. Do you think our friendship is getting stronger/weaker/or staying the same?
    My answer is pretty much the same as yours… it got stronger at first, but it’s been the same for a while now because I think that the distance is rather limiting.

    19. Do you feel that you could talk to me about anything and I would listen?
    Yes. Although I don’t always agree with your opinions, I appreciate your honesty and as I’ve told you before, it gives me a different perspective to look at.

    20. Are you going to put this on your journal and see what I say about you?
    I did it first! hehehe…
    Posted 1/31/2004 5:30 AM by Bleudonne

    #^^# Thanks, Dawn!

    You were right, this is a neat quiz.

    *big hug* :)
    Posted 1/31/2004 10:27 AM by cosleia

    By the way, amend Q14… I haven’t met you in RL, but I’d like to, you and HF. One of these days! ^_^
    Posted 2/1/2004 1:18 AM by Bleudonne

    1. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.

    They used to call you “That Girl That Talks to the Walls”. But I don’t really think you do that much anymore. I think it would be badass if I could call you Spaz, but it doesn’t really fit at all. Really, I just want to be able to call someone Spaz. I hate nicknames, so I’m going to leave it at that. ;D

    2. Am I loveable?

    Eh. It’s questions like these that make quizzes like these odd. Loveable? Who isn’t, in their own right? I guess if you went with what I believe to be the truest form of the term, you’re right up there. You have that way of just coming up and rubbing my shoulders, or making food for everyone – helping with cleaning after meals – you have a big heart, and while many people could be termed “thoughtful”, you really are.

    3. How long have you known me?

    Since about 1979, I guess? ;>

    4. When and how did we first meet?

    I was born. :>

    5. What was your first impression?

    I believe that I was just in awe that there was a little person like me running around and doing things I could do? Tricky question, considering our situation.

    6. Do you still think that way about me now?

    Well, you are quite a bit shorter than I am. But I’m going to have to go with “no”. Something about being in our mid-twenties destroys that whole “wow, she can walk!” thing.

    7. What do you think my weakness is?

    You’re non-confrontational. I’ll give the perfectionism a nod, but I don’t think that’s necessarily a weakness. I’ve seen you break down when people around you argue, because you can’t stand it. When you were growing up, you took a lot of shit from kids at school and didn’t say a word about it to them. A bit later on, you did start speaking back, but I feel like you aren’t well enough trained in it – you have a range of being far too little or far too much. I’ve seen you erupt about shit that shouldn’t have bothered you, and I’ve seen you take crap that you didn’t deserve. I guess I have a bit of a heads up on most here, because I know you in person. It’s different online – it’s easier to be direct and strong and opinionated. I’m choosing this “weakness” because I think that it extends to a lot of different areas outside of simple verbal back and forth. It travels into dealings with others – friends, family, fellow employees, associates, etc. When [U.L.] patted your ass or when [S.W.] kept calling me that one time. When you and I would argue. When other family things weren’t going great. That roommate you had down in Alabama.

    8. Do you think I’ll get married?

    I knew you would. But that didn’t help shake the oddness when you finally did. You’d had rather bad luck with guys, and me not really ever getting to know Sean didn’t help out, I guess. But I’m definately happy for you, and I’ve had enough time now to come to accept that my big sister is hitched. ;>

    9. What makes me happy?

    Staying in-line with the earlier mention of thoughtfulness, I’d say that it’s a fairly good example that you are happy when other people are happy because of something you did. Of course, happiness isn’t a “yes or no” question, and there’s a multitude of things that can make a person happy. Sean, your family, your nephews, getting a new desk. Watching a great movie. I’d say that the perfect profession for you would have been something like a teacher or nurse or something where you get in there and talk and work with people, because though you aren’t the most outgoing person I’ve ever met (;D) you still enjoy being able to help. However, flip back to what I termed as your weakness, I think it’s your gradually-learned ineffectiveness at dealing with conflict (Not saying you can’t deal with it, just saying that you *can* get overworked, and when you do, it’s hell for you and you end up needing to just get a break from it.) that kept you from jumping right in on that sort of a line of work.

    10. What makes me sad?

    Feeling left out. Feelings of insignificance. Situations where you wish you could help but you can’t do a thing – like Ben, that old man, and the belt fiasco at the bowling alley.

    11. What reminds you of me?

    The piano, my kids, the neat presents you’ve given me over the past few years that I have adorning my desk. You really do pick out incredible gifts for me – things I’d love to have without even realizing it. When am I going to use this spyglass? Who cares? It’s pimp as hell, and I show it to everyone that comes over.

    12. If you could give me anything what would it be?

    Reassurance that life truly is what you make of it, and a stout push to get you past the speedbumps and onto the true satisfaction you deserve in life.

    13. How well do you know me?

    That’s a great question. I think I know you pretty good. But you may not think I know you at all. I was with you back in High School – I saw what happened to you there. I grew up with you in our house, and I know what I and the rest of the family put you through. I remember going to visit you in the hospital when I was up on campus. I remember how upset you got when Jazz talked all the way through your deeply planned out Star Wars marathon. ;>

    14. When’s the last time you saw me?

    Christmas, when you were up here.

    15. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn’t?

    Is there a brother or sister out there that *hasn’t* held back something at one point or another. I think that in some cases, sometimes we shared shit between us that we probably shouldn’t have, but I know there has to be a swarray of things we never did say. Probably for the best. ;>

    16. Do you think I could kill someone?

    No. No, I don’t think you could. I don’t mean physically. You aren’t a violent person. You’re actually very emotional. Like your reaction to the trouble at the bowling alley – or your willingness to accept burdens you shouldn’t have to bear. One could say that it might all build up, and then one day you go over the top – but I don’t believe that about you. When people do you wrong or do wrong in your presense, they’re hurting you badly, because you won’t strike back at them. You’ll absorb the damage and mentally rack yourself to understand them or to define the situation in a philisophical sense. You berate yourself when others do you wrong, because you don’t like to place blame directly on them. I think I may have received more backlash than anyone else in your life – and maybe I’m wrong, but that’s what I’m thinking – but your angry letters weren’t angry. They were pleas for me to understand you and to accept you – or to point out my faults so blatantly and so without hostility that all I could do was nod my head to the printed words and agree.

    17. Describe me in one word.

    I’ll agree with Brilliant. I think that works great. You’re so.. you. You’re talented, intelligent, and all the rest of the sha-bang, you’re proud without pride, and you’re argumentative without the will to argue. You’re beyond brilliant, really, because when you’re in your best, you’re a blessing to everyone about you, but there’s always an underlying muddle of conflicted thoughts and concerns that make you deep. You aren’t a “blonde” by the standard description. You have more shit going on inside of your head than most people, and it’s like containing a power that could rise out to destroy you. Somehow you balance it all and keep going through the rough and not-so-rough times, and I’ve seen your happiness grow all the greater here in the past few years, and I just know that you’re on your way to working out all the problems in your life and getting to where you always wanted – and deserve – to be.

    18. Do you think our friendship is getting stronger/weaker/or staying the same?

    There’s only one answer for that – stronger, most definately. Come on. We’re brother and sister. All we ever did was gnaw on one another’s nerves when we lived together. Now we both have our own lives, with still a connection between us, and if we happen to talk, it isn’t a run-in in the hallway. It’s a conversation because we choose to conversate.

    19. Do you feel that you could talk to me about anything and I would listen?

    In the purest form, sure. You’re good at listening. But you’re also good at getting upset over certain topics of conversation. I’ve learned that well enough over the years. There are some things we don’t talk about, and that’s perfectly fine – because there’s no need to discuss everything under the sun. You used to get upset and flee to your room if we were arguing over beliefs or values, but I’ve seen you more willing lately to hear out opposite sides of arguments. Most definately I think I’d be more willing to talk to you about anything now as compared to then, but as we’re still siblings, there is a grey line between us that we just shouldn’t cross in conversation. ;D

    20. Are you going to put this on your journal and see what I say about you?

    Journals are for fags. :>
    Posted 2/2/2004 12:38 AM by JakeThorin

    AJ, thank you so much for your answers. We talked about it on AIM, but I just want to say that you’ve made me so happy :) In the past, I have envied you and resented you, but since we’ve become adults those feelings have turned into admiration and respect (with a little jealousy here and there ;>). We’ve gone through a lot, you and I, but through it all I have had one great wish emerge: for you to like me.

    I know that seems pretty pathetic :> But because I respect you so much, I wanted to be worthy of your respect. And more than that, I wanted you to understand me…and then to accept me, despite my flaws.

    Your responses have shown me that you harbor an esteem for me I couldn’t have even imagined. It was such a wonderful, amazing experience to read what you wrote. Thank you.
    Posted 2/2/2004 2:03 PM by cosleia

    In other news, you’re an ass. ;>
    Posted 2/2/2004 9:15 PM by cosleia

    Yeah, yeah. No eProps for you, then.
    Posted 2/3/2004 12:41 PM by JakeThorin

    Posted 2/3/2004 9:13 PM by cosleia

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