When my eyes open, there is none of the usual morning fog. I have slept just enough, and now I am awake.
The blankets are warm atop me, but I don’t need to stay beneath them. I cast them off and roll over and up. I stand and unplug my phone and step into the master bath.
It’s chilly, but not uncomfortably so. It feels like expectation: bare feet on cool floor, cool air tingling against bare arms and legs.
I stand at the vanity and sort supplements into my pill box: D3 for Monday and Thursday, everything else every day. Multivitamin. Calcium. Probiotic. Iron. And birth control, not because I can conceive but simply to regulate my damaged system.
I think about how much longer this day will be for me than yesterday–yesterday, when I slept until midday and napped in the afternoon. I feel rested and ready for whatever I might do today. I feel excited. I feel the promise of the day. All the things I might choose to do sit out ahead, waiting patiently for my decision. I can choose whatever I want; I feel no particular pressure.
I shower, get dressed, eschew eye makeup. I pull on jeans and a long-sleeved shirt and white socks and sneakers. I grab a protein shake and start a load of laundry.
At my computer, I review the things I’d thought of doing yesterday. Toward the end of the night I’d come across a beautiful photo of a waterfall. It’s two hours away in a national preserve. I think about going there. And again, I feel excited.
The day is so full of potential. I won’t waste it. I’ll wait until the load of laundry is washed. I’ll put it in the dryer. And then I’ll head out into the world.
This morning I took a very long walk–more than two hours, anyway–through the woods and alongside the Chattahoochee River. I took a trail I hadn’t explored before and ended up coming out near a distant apartment complex. There was a map there so I was able to tell that if I walked some more, I would find the abandoned mill I’ve been interested in seeing…but by that point I was pretty tired and I knew I needed to get water soon. So I ended up turning around and heading back the way I came.
The walk back was strangely energizing. It was as if, knowing there was a finite distance left, my body decided to push out a lasting burst of energy. Soon I found myself jogging the forest trail, weaving through the trees, barreling down little creek-cut valleys and back out of them, leaping side to side to avoid obstacles like rocks, roots, and other hikers.
Finally, elated and covered with sweat, I emerged from the pines and took a quick left back to the nearest parking area, where I availed myself of the water fountain with measured abandon.
The walk back from there was a nice cool-down. I stuck to the river path to keep out of the sun, smiling at all the walkers, runners, bikers, and dog walkers who were out enjoying this hot, beautiful day with me. And then, finally, I was done, ready to relax in the air conditioning with a tall glass of water.
And it was lovely. Things are starting to bloom. I’ll have pictures to post tonight.
We have a vine here that boasts beautiful purple flowers with a star/pentagon shape in the center. I brought one such flower and a pine cone in to my office. Not sure how long the flower will last, but for today at least I have a little bit of nature here to remind me that spring is here.
(Now, if only my office wasn’t sweltering…)