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You Need This Thing

You absolutely must have this thing.

It is not a question of whether or not you should have it. It is a question of how soon you will allow yourself to be satisfied, how soon you will finally answer the undeniable yearnings of your heart.

If you do not buy this thing, you will be so unhappy. In fact, you are unhappy right now, and you will remain unhappy until you buy this thing. Buying this thing will make you happy, for that familiar, fleeting, glorious moment that confirms you are fulfilling your life’s purpose.

Won’t everyone be envious once you have it? Won’t everyone acknowledge your superior taste, your purchasing power?

Think of your family, and how enriched their lives will be. Think of your friends, and how much more they’ll respect you. And think, once again, of your happiness. Think of all these things and know that the solution to any problem in your life, the only solution, the solution that keeps the sun rising and setting, is this thing.

You must buy it. You must buy it now.