Categories
Diary

Shelter-in-Place: Day 138

I was pretty much already awake when my alarm went off. I felt vaguely like staying in bed for a bit, but I also knew I was awake, so I went ahead and got up. I did my full morning routine and sat down at my computer at 7am, thinking I would get some writing done, but so far I’ve just been scrolling Twitter and feeling a little…off. Not sick, but just mentally distant. Like I’ve partially slipped into another dimension, but not completely, so I’m not here but I’m not there either.

This week has been mostly really good, starting with the weekend. I wrote all day Saturday and Sunday and got several stories to a new and fun place. Monday and Tuesday were of course work days, but work was interesting and I accomplished things, and I also did some writing in the mornings and at lunch. In the evenings I relaxed and enjoyed myself. Last night Sean and I watched the extended cut of Ghostbusters (2016) and wow, they should not have edited it down for the theatrical release. It was perfect at its original length. The cameos felt more natural, the story was more cohesive, and overall it was way funnier. I thought it was pretty funny before, but damn.

Yesterday there was some “drama” in my main fandom space, and it bothered me enough to say something. Usually I just try to ignore stuff like that, because it’s almost always driven by personal preferences that aren’t going to change anyway, but I was seeing a lot of piling-on that had nothing to do with the original topic and it was making me mad. I felt that an entire swath of people were being generalized and demonized because they use a certain fandom term. I wrote and deleted-without-posting a snarky comment, and then I wrote something a bit longer and more thoughtful and less douchey.

Whenever stuff like this happens I feel antsy, like I’m just waiting for something terrible, but I think maybe now that it’s the next day it has died down? Here’s hoping.

Some people thrive on this “drama”, but I absolutely hate it. It’s so pointless, creating in-groups based on nothing but personal preference. It’s just an excuse to be hateful to others. I want to explore a bunch of ideas; I don’t want to imply to anyone that there must be a consensus about any idea about entertainment. Yes, it feels very good when someone likes or agrees with your ideas. But that doesn’t mean you and that someone are “right” or that “defending” those ideas by deriding others is a good thing.

Anyway, that’s probably why I’m in this strange sort of fugue this morning. I’m sure my brain will function just fine for work—the fact that I was thinking about and looking forward to work tasks when I woke up is promising—but I hope it will get back to a creative writing state today too. I’ve been enjoying my streak!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.