Fuzzy

Via Mari. Yes, I did fix the spelling errors.

Chinchilla
You’re a chinchilla:
Super cute and adorable, groomed to be the fuzzy master! You’re the FUZZIEST!!!!!!!! You have so many layers of fuzz you can’t even find your own feet. You’re cute and proud of it, so fuzzy and outgoing, no wonder people like you! And just look at those whiskers! =^_^= =^_^= What fuzzy animal are you? =^_^= {-With Pictures!-}
brought to you by Quizilla

Moods and favors

I left my laptop on its desk in the bedroom all day today. I, on the other hand, spent my time sitting on the couch, watching TV. I watched Boy Meets World, Kim Possible, Full House, a little of The Price Is Right, Hercules (the Disney movie), and The Batman. Later, Reid very kindly drove me over to Robert and Julia’s house (my former boss and his wife of four days) to pick up a TV and stereo that they decided to give to me and Sean. After very kindly wrestling the items into the back of his massive custom diesel truck, Reid very kindly drove them (and me) to Audrey’s house, as she’d offered to store them for me. (Audrey used to work at Smoak’s, then came to 2go-Box after they closed.)

I keep saying that Reid “very kindly” did these things, not only because it was kind of him to do so, very kind, but also because he didn’t seem to be quite in the mood for it. Sean gets the same way…I call it sulking when Sean does it, but I’m not about to use that kind of word to describe my father-in-law. Suffice it to say that I started to feel very badly about asking him to do it, so I thanked him several times, and of course did my best to help wherever I could.

Ultimately, it worked out okay. We finished our errand and made it home, and Cheryl and Sean appeared shortly with KFC, so Reid didn’t have to cook. Then Reid got to watch his TV for awhile, which I know he likes to do to unwind.

So everything’s okay. It’s just that I am highly sensitive to moods, and typically unable to “fix” a bad one, so I get anxious. Being married to Sean is helping temper that (when he’s in a bad mood, I’ve learned it’s best to just lay low until it blows over), but I have a long way to go.

Now I’m just relaxing, reading, chatting, and pondering getting some ice cream…

What’s your blog worth?


My blog is worth $8,468.10.
How much is your blog worth?

$8,468.10, eh? I’m not sure if I should be pleased or irritated.

Here are a few comparison prices:

Derik: $17,500.74
Magazine Man: $54,760.38
Websnark: $108,391.68
Wil Wheaton dot Net: $1,639,988.70
Luke: $9,032.64
Goei: $564.54
Kelly: $564.54
Japundit: $141,699.54
Miklos: $5,645.40
Sunshine: $18,629.82
Hanzi Smatter: $184,604.58
Language Log: $353,966.58
Simon: $29,920.62

I guess I make an okay showing.

It’s fairly interesting to see how the math for these numbers was originally conceived. The data, of course, is taken from Technorati (which explains a lot, really). Here’s the link if you want to see how much your blog is (supposedly) worth.

Excuse me while I employ some profanity

Fuckers.

Stupid fuckers.

So Springhouse told me that when they demoed, they’d look through the rubble for anything salvageable. They also said they’d call and let me know what was going on. I was, as you know, hoping that our computer hard drives might be recovered.

They never called.

So I called today.

Got some new girl I’ve never heard of. The people I know weren’t there. And she told me that the demo had already taken place, that it was done with bulldozers and forklifts, that everything was piled into a dumpster, and that the wreckage “was never touched by human hands”.

Thanks a lot, Springhouse Shithouse.

"My goal is to stay alive and uninjured until Christmas…"

Today my friend Eric from kung fu, currently stationed in Iraq with the Kentucky National Guard, posted the following sobering piece on his LiveJournal.

I don’t mean to say this casually, but our odds of losing people in the next two months is very high. Of course no one can predict that kind of thing and I genuinely hope I am wrong. One guy said to me today “…I just don’t think there is any way I can tell you how bad this place [where we’re going] is…”. If we had a mission up there I still probably wouldn’t feel better, but we don’t. Someone told me that every other National Guard unit from KY that’s been to Iraq was only in country ten months. So much for precedence. :P My goal is to stay alive and uninjured until Christmas…if I can make it that long I should be alright. Every day that I wake up I know I am one day closer to my wife and family and that keeps me going. This kind of warfare typically won’t involve protracted gun battles or even present the opportunity for us to return fire at our enemy…it’s just bombs. One minute you’re driving along talking about going home and the next you’re permentely handicapped or worse. These people have been doing this for several years now and they’re good at it.

Stay safe, man.

Got languages?

My cousin Carl spent four months in Zambia working with missionaries this past summer. Today, Japanese.About.com highlights how to write Zambia (ザンビア) and its capital, Lusaka (ルサカ) in Japanese. Most interesting to me was this, though:

Languages: English, Bemba, Kaonda, Lozi, Lunda, Luvale, Nyanja, Tonga, and about 70 other indigenous languages

Yow.

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Natural Wonders

There used to be a store in Fayette Mall (Lexington, Kentucky) called Natural Wonders. It remains my favorite mall store ever, despite the fact that it closed years ago.

As the name implies, Natural Wonders sold various items relating to the natural world. These included educational products, but also garden accessories, CDs with New Age-ish music, bird houses, telescopes, jewelry, posters, bath products, toys, games, rocks, gems, rain sticks, kites, wind chimes, star maps, statuettes, and collectibles. One of my favorite product lines consisted of little round treasure boxes carved of wood, with geode cross-sections inlaid in the lids. I actually owned one; it was a darker brown wood with a blue crystal lid, and it on display in my living room.

Every time I went to the mall, I went to Natural Wonders. And every time, I lusted after their products that made nature seem so beautiful and elegant, yet so accessible. The New Age music they sold was always playing over the speakers, giving the store a very soothing ambience, and there was a TV in the back that ran fascinating educational videos.

I had a dream of collecting dozens of geode boxes. They also had a gorgeous chess set on display once that I coveted. Ultimately, though, my high school budget limited me to just that one geode box.

Years later, after I’d graduated high school, moved to Huntsville, Alabama, dropped out of college and moved back, got cancer, and recovered, they closed Natural Wonders.

All-Time 100 Novels

Time Magazine has a list of “the 100 best English language novels from 1923 to the present”. Em listed which of the books she’d actually read…so I thought I’d do the same!

  1. All the King’s Men (read for an English lit criticism class in college)
  2. Animal Farm (read sophomore year of high school)
  3. Are You There, God? It’s Me, Margaret (read on my own sometime when I was in middle school I think)
  4. Beloved (read for “The Woman Writer” class in college; best Toni Morrison book I ever read)
  5. The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe (read on my own when I was in grade school)
  6. Lord of the Flies (read senior year of high school)
  7. The Lord of the Rings (okay, technically I’ve only read Fellowship and the first few chapters of Two Towers)
  8. 1984 (read senior year of high school)
  9. The Sun Also Rises (read for an American Lit class in college)
  10. To Kill a Mockingbird (read freshman year of high school)
  11. Wide Sargasso Sea (read for “The Woman Writer” class in college)

Yeah, I need to read more. College forced me to read loads of good books. Too bad I don’t have that kind of motivation anymore. (Also too bad I don’t have my books anymore…)

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The Brazilian Saga, Part One: Oh the Hair, the Hair!

A normal Brazilian wax covers (well, uncovers) the so-called “bikini” area. You know. The hoo-hah zone. The procedure apparently involves leaving a “landing strip” leading to the area in question, but I’m going to opt out of that if at all possible. I am accustomed to being completely bare, and prefer to stay that way.

I have decided that it’s not worth it to only wax the unmentionables. I’m going to have my legs done, too. It’s only fair. I hate shaving. How annoying would it be to have to shave one place and wax another? (My underarms are still under debate.)

In order to have one’s unwanted hair ripped off, one must first allow one’s unwanted hair to grow.

I have been, and believe me, it isn’t pretty.

My hair isn’t uberlong. It’s not Planet of the Apes over here. But it’s longer than I’d like. I have been very tempted to just shave it already for days now, and I hate shaving. But in the interest of science and the blog post I’m going to write about this experience and my sex life (paradoxically), I haven’t given in. I’ve let it grow.

And I’m just going to keep letting it grow, because I have to wait until either 1) I get paid for one of my freelance projects, which will hopefully happen tomorrow but you never know; or 2) Sean gets paid, which will be at the end of the month. In the meantime, I’ve been psyching myself up for and educating myself about the experience.

For example, I’ve read that a loofah may be employed to ward off the bane of my existence, the ingrown hair. Yesterday, at something like 11 at night, I slunk into the Evans Super Wal-Mart (wearing shorts–my hairy legs exposed–the horror!) and nicked one. After using it this morning, I have to say that I really have no idea why people think loofahs are evil. It was such a great, invigorating feeling to scrub myself with it. Yes, even you-know-where. Sheesh, people are such wussies!

(I may feel differently when my skin is red and raw from waxing, but for now…wussies!)

///

Read the other chapters in the Brazilian Saga! (They’re high in fiber.)

Foreshadowing
Part Two: I totally caved
Part Three: OW OW OW OW OW OMGWTF OW
Part Four: The Day After
Epilogue

I am "domesticated"

Before I tumble off into sleep, I wanted to relate an anecdote.

Not long after I got back from the Tour of Homes, I asked Sean if he was hungry and he said yes. So I went looking for something to make for dinner.

My grandmother sent a can of pink salmon with me the last time I visited, and it had a recipe for a “Salmon Biscuit Roll” on it. I’d thought that sounded great, and had been waiting for an opportunity to make it. Today seemed as good as any.

I assembled the ingredients, making a few substitutions here and there, and prepared the dish. I mixed the salmon with Swiss cheese, an egg, and some celery salt (the recipe called for green onions–we didn’t even have regular onions or onion powder–and parsley, which we didn’t have either). Then I made biscuit dough, rolled it out (actually, I had to flatten it with my hands, because apparently Cheryl doesn’t have a rolling pin), and put the salmon mixture on top. I rolled it up long-ways and sealed the roll, then shaped it into a circle and sealed the ends together. Then I cut 12 slits in the roll and pulled them all to one side. This made for a very pretty pinwheel effect. A brushing of egg (which I did with my hand, because apparently Cheryl doesn’t have a basting brush, which seems weird since they barbecue), and it went into the oven for 25 minutes. While it cooked I made the suggested condiment, sour cream plus parmesan cheese and salt and pepper and (in my case, since I didn’t have dill weed) celery salt. A quick side dish of Kentucky Wonder Style green beans, and dinner was ready.

“This is really good,” Sean said, digging into it. “Did they buy this, or did you?”

“I made it from scratch,” I said…and his eyes actually bugged out. “From a can of pink salmon my grandma gave me.”

“It’s great,” Sean said, and then, as if deciding that wasn’t quite sufficient, he stressed, “This is wonderful.”

So! I can cook stuff after all!

Summerville Tour of Homes

As planned, Brooke and I met up today to attend the Summerville 28th Annual Tour of Homes. I’m sure you could predict the fact that there are pictures. Unfortunately, we weren’t allowed to take any pictures inside the houses, which means you don’t get to see the stuff we were drooling over all day.

After eating far too much at Theresa’s Mexican Restaurant downtown (roughly across the street from Outspokin’), we headed down to the ASU campus, where the tour was to begin. After getting our bearings, we walked to the first historic site, ASU’s Bellevue Hall.

Bellevue Hall

The building has been completely restored and now houses offices for University staff. It looked like a very pleasant place to work :)

We wandered back towards the main entrance where the tour buses would take us to the next site. On our way we stopped and looked at a strange vine maze that I think Connor would love.

vine maze - I wanted to go in!

Then we hopped on the bus and were off to the first house.

Actually, the bus took us to the last house on the tour first. They’d changed the order of the tour, I’m guessing due to traffic considerations. And so the first house we saw was 2532 Henry Street.

I was pleasantly reminded of the older houses in downtown Lexington, like the one owned by my former linguistics professor, Dr. Bosch, or the one owned by my cousin’s son’s dead father’s mother and her lesbian life partner. (Okay, that was difficult to describe…) I thought it was perfectly charming. Brooke’s reaction was something like: “It’s small! It’s so small! I mean, it’s really small!”

We waited for the bus for quite some time, then got tired of waiting and walked back to ASU. We’d planned to take Brooke’s car to the next house, but the funny tour guide lady and driver guy talked us into trying the bus again, so we did.

The next house was 705 Gary Street. Gary Street is probably a block and a half long, and runs between Battle Row and Gardner, near Milledge. The house was built sideways on the lot, allowing the front porch a beautiful view of a line of tall pine trees. As the bus tour guide said, from the front of the house it looks like they’re out in the middle of the woods. This house retained quite a few of its original features, including dark wooden doors with glass knobs and yellow hardwood floors. It had a fantastic wraparound porch that overlooked the backyard.

705 Gary Street

After touring the house, we sat around outside waiting for the bus for a long time. We were far enough from everything that we couldn’t really walk to the next one. Well, maybe we could have, but we didn’t. Both of us were a little disgruntled when the bus finally arrived.

This bus, not the one we’d ridden before but the only other one being used for the tour, took us to 1338 Wingfield Street, of which I did not get a picture. Just so you know, it’s a “classic Augusta bungalow”, made of “stucco, brick, and wood trim”, according to the guidebook. I wish I could actually remember something about the inside of the house. I think this was the one with the cute baby’s room done up in green, but I’m not sure. [Edit: I was wrong! See the comments.] Fun fact: the woman who lives here is named “Cheri”. (Cheri-sama!)

The next two houses were within very easy walking distance, so we strolled over. First was 1447 Winter Street, and next was its “sister”, 1453 Winter Street, right next door. “Their architecture is a Southern version of the American foursquare house in the Prairie style, a predecessor of Frank Lloyd Wright’s revolutionary residential style of the early 1900’s,” says the guidebook. Both of these houses were updated beautifully and were quite luxurious. 1447 had perhaps the largest master bathroom in the free world, and 1453 had a fantastic kitchen.

Next up: 1434 Heath Street. Fun fact! Brooke lives on Heath Street, but by virtue of being on the other side of Wrightsboro Road, does not live in Summerville. This means she pays lower taxes!

1434 Heath Street

Brooke was perplexed by the peak in the porch gable. The guidebook says this style emulates “Oriental” temple roofs and was popular on the west coast. I’m not sure how it got out here.

The final house, 2341 McDowell Street, was Brooke’s favorite. It’s a modified Tudor design with lots of rooms and a two-car garage in the back. Most striking was an upstairs bedroom, quite narrow but with walls almost entirely made of windows looking out on the trees. It was so cozy and open to nature that Brooke and I both decided we’d be perfectly happy living there.

2341 McDowell Street

And there you have it. I hope I got all those details right; trying to remember everything without having photographic evidence is kind of a pain. Brooke, feel free to correct me.

I had a really good time at the Summerville Tour of Homes. I would definitely like to go again next year…assuming I can once again score free tickets ;>

"Meanwhile, at the Hall of Justice…"

Scott Kurtz has thrown his two cents in concerning the everhilarious Jack Thompson vs. Penny Arcade fiasco. Kurtz has gotten a hold of Thompson’s latest effort to involve third parties in the fight he’s obviously too incompetent to win on his own. I’ve retyped the letter below:

John B. Thompson, Attorney at Law
[address blacked out]
October 18, 2005

Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman,
The Flash, Green Lantern, Martian Manhunter

Justice League of America Watchtower
asynchronous orbit
The Moon

Dear Justice League of America:

My name is Jack Thompson and I too am a crime-fighter. I am currently on a crusade against video-game companies who are using mind-control devices to turn the youth of our country into their own personal army of murder-teens. I’ve been doing my part, dishing out my own brand of two-fisted justice in the battle against these nefarious villains.

Now, there is a new evil and it’s coming from a Seattle company known as Penny Arcade. I can provide details directly to your justice computer, but basically this company has been using, I believe I can show, their Internet site and various other means to assist the Legion of Doom to poison the city’s water supply.

I’ve been in contact with Penny Arcade and informed them of the following:

1) That their days of crime would soon come to an end.
2) That they could do whatever they wanted to me, but leave the girl alone.
3) That they would never get away with this.

I need the help of the Justice League to stop the evil forces of Penny Arcade. I will warn you that it’s possible that they are in the possession of Kryptonite. I can’t confirm that, but these vile fiends are not above such diabolical means.

Please contact me via the usual means. Either a large searchlight with a logo on it, floating outside my upper-story window, or popping out of the darkness surprisingly when I turn around.

Regards, Jack Thompson.

Calling in the big guns, isn’t he? Who do you think would win in a fight: Superman, or Gabe? Batman, or Tycho?

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The comfort of home

Thanks to my wonderful mom, I now have a desk for my laptop. It’s one of those rolling, tilting, height-adjustable desks, suitable for computing at a regular chair, or in bed.

Case in point:

lazy computing!

(Also, I got a haircut recently. It doesn’t normally look that doofy, honest. I didn’t bother to do anything to it before I took the picture, because I have no shame.

(That’s not true. Actually, I have a lot of shame. But I also have a weird desire to bear all my flaws publicly…)

So, nice desk, huh? It makes it loads more comfortable for me to be on the computer in the bedroom. Thank you so much, Mom!

Okay, Kim Possible rules, end of story

In the episode on right now, Kim’s grandmother, Nana, is under mind control by Dr. Drakken. Drakken’s gloating and telling Kim how Nana studied kung fu and was the first woman to complete the Navy SEALS training program.

Drakken: Your Nana is one bad. grand. mother
Kim: Shut your mouth!
Drakken: I’m just talkin’ ’bout Nana.

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